Humankind's Latest Monument to Arrogance

A look at Royal Caribbean's "Icon of the Seas"

Modern humans have a pretty slick track record of defying the natural order of things for personal comfort and preference. Phoenix, Arizona is the epitome of this phenomenon. People move for the constant sunshine and warm winters, but survive those impossibly hot spring, summer, and fall days by shuttling from climate-controlled vehicles to climate-controlled restaurants before heading home to their climate-controlled abode.

King of the Hill summed it up best by calling it a monument to man’s arrogance.

Phoenix may hold the urban title for arrogance, but Royal Caribbean wins at sea by a long shot.

You may have seen the news that their latest abomination “Icon of the Seas'“ will set sail in January 2024. It’s more than five times the size of the Titanic, an obvious but equally odd choice to compare your vessel to.

Royal Caribbean has long been criticized for their floating cities that double as petri dishes. They’re heavy polluters, they often contribute to erosion wherever they dock, and their tourists flood into cities for selfies. Oh, and they’re notoriously awful to their crew. It’s why many cities are starting to ban cruises from docking.

Like most travel businesses, the cruise industry took a massive COVID hit. Some, such as myself, cheered on its downfall in an ecstasy of schadenfreude.

Burn, baby, burn.

But because we’ve seemingly learned nothing from the comparative calm of the pandemic, Royal Caribbean is apparently doubling down on the worst of human instincts––despite having COVID on board.

That instinct being, to embrace personal comfort no matter the cost to the natural environment.

No means of long-distance travel is perfect. Even my beloved-trains aren’t climate neutral. But I sincerely hope that we can all agree that these floating monstrosities go the way of the zeppelin––sans fiery explosion, of course.

In the meantime, should any of your friends or your partner suggest a Royal Caribbean getaway, treat it as a painfully obvious sign to cut ties with them. Clearly they wish you harm.

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