Why should tourists leave a tip?

Yeah, the tipping system sucks. But don't be that tourist stiffing waiters.

Every now and again, there’s a flare up in (mostly) European tourists complaining about US tipping culture. American wait staff share stories of Europeans stiffing them on the customary 20 percent. Some Europeans themselves decry the practice, refusing to take part in it because it shouldn’t be the customer’s responsibility to provide wait staff a living wage.

On this, I think we can all agree. Wait staff deserve a fair, respectable, living wage that doesn’t put them in the unenviable position of kissing ass all night in hopes of making enough money to pay the bills. Customers shouldn’t have to make up the difference.

Unfortunately, that’s not the reality on the ground. American waiters do rely on tips. And stiffing them on the tip does nothing to change things and only hurts folks trying to make a living.

I’m talking about this now because of a recent Twitter exchange that made me want to slam my head against a wall (par for the course with Twitter, to be fair). Someone, European, bemoaned having to tip 20 percent when traveling in the US and asked what others think about it. I chimed in, saying it indeed sucks and isn’t right, but the expectation of leaving a tip is reality. So to stiff a waiter because you don’t agree with the practice does nothing but hurt the waiter. It certainly won’t help change things.

“Hans didn’t cough up 20 percent! Guess I, an impossibly busy employer of a restaurant, need to campaign and change US labor law.“

That’s not how it works. And deep down, I think everyone who stiffs a waiter knows that doing so won’t change a thing. But they hide behind the language of social justice (They deserve a living wage!) to financially hurt working people while they’re sucking down another glass of wine on vacation.

Another chimed in when I suggested that nobody is forcing tourists to pay for an overseas flight to the US and to patronize sit-down restaurants where you’re generally expected to leave a tip. If the practice upsets you so much that you’ll take money out of the hands of wait staff (just like their employer you claim is unjust), then stay home. Many of us have traveled to places with local customs we either didn’t understand or agree with. But, we’re guests. So we do as the locals do to the best of our ability.

That was the gist of my argument. Their response?

“How long are we tourists meant to wait for waiters to get a living wage?“

Essentially, this person was suggesting that it’s taking too long for the US to fix this glaring economic injustice––and this tourist’s got a bucket list! So they’re going to come, ignore the tipping custom, and get on with their itinerary.

This is the mindset of someone who thinks of places as destinations that owe us something for showing up. The fact is, travel is a privilege––not a right. Places don’t owe us a damn thing.

But why would someone think a place owes a tourist something? Because of money.

This gets to another retort when I suggest that perhaps you shouldn’t travel to the US if tipping wait staff is too troublesome for you. The argument goes, not coming at all would hurt tourism and more folks in the process.

There’s probably some truth to that. But the idea that someone would cancel their trip because they don’t want to pay a 20 percent tip strikes me as a bluff as transparent as someone holding their cards backwards for all to see.

If you can afford to pay for an overseas flight, hotels, and travel within the country, then you can cough up a tip for wait staff. And if paying that tip is the difference between keeping your bank account in the black and financial ruin, then perhaps you should second guess your trip.

This tourist behavior or mindset extends beyond US tipping culture. We all make moral and ethical decisions in food and travel that, if we really challenge ourselves, go against our ideals.

Case in point, how many people have you heard say something to the effect of “I’d much rather take a train than fly. But the flight is so cheap!“

I’m certainly guilty of this. I neither have a soap box to stand nor am I holier than thou. But I do like to think I’m capable of a little self-reflection and can admit to myself when I’m perhaps causing more harm or contributing to something unethical for my own pleasure. We all participate in existing systems we loathe that were well established before we got here and are seemingly impossible to work around without living off the grid. It’s not your waiter’s fault.

I also think the idea of traveling to the US and bucking the tipping custom is a bit more palatable to tourists because it’s the United States––the world’s most powerful nation that frequently pumps itself up as the best country in the world. For some, I think sticking it to the US feels a bit like poking the Monopoly man in the eye.

What some might not know about the US, despite all its bravado and masturbatory narcissism, is that a growing number of folks don’t benefit in the slightest from living in the world’s most powerful nation. So when you screw over a waiter, you’re not poking the Monopoly guy in the eye. You’re taking money out of a working person’s pocket and pointing to the injustices of the country at large and saying, “They started it!“

Just like a child.